#256 - Do you LONG for a Real Life, In Person, Best Friend?

Proverbs 18:24 - The man of many friends [a friend of all the world] will prove himself a bad friend, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother (sister*). 

Proverbs 31:20 - She opens her hand to the poor, yes, she reaches out her filled hands to the needy [whether in body, mind, or spirit]. 

Have you longed for a friend? Not just any friend, but a friend that can sit down at your kitchen table and just by the way you move around your kitchen, they know immediately that something is wrong. The kind of friend that can come over and see you without make-up on, and you're OK with it. The kind of friend who is OK just being bored at your house, even if you are cleaning, doing laundry, dishes, whatever needs done... while they either help, or talk while you work. Better yet, they listen while you work. They provide that listening ear for the thing you desperately want to get off your heart. They don't judge you. They keep you accountable if they see you overstep boundaries that a Christian woman should not overstep. They don't gossip. They build up, lift up and encourage.  They believe in your dreams. They are your biggest cheerleader.

Does this person to you, sound like an impossible figment of our imagination? The literal perfect friend and perfect relationship. An iron sharpener in the life of a mom, wife, sister, daughter, Christian woman. I think this person DOES sound like a dream friend!! BUT... this person is possible!!

As I was reading Proverbs 18:24, I decided to check out the Greek/Hebrew breakdown of who this friend really is. This was encouraging. Here are a few of my favorite depiction's from the Hebrew breakdown for the latter part of the verse: ...and there is a friend [that] sticketh closer than a brother.

• there is = being, existence, substance, there is or are
• a friend = human love for another, includes family; human love for or to God; act of being a friend; God's love toward man
• [that] sticketh closer = clinging, adhering to
• than a brother = each to the other (reciprocal relationship)

In the AMT version... otherwise known as the "Amy McCart Translation" :) ... this verse could break down this way, and it sounds so encouraging! 

There is in existence, an actual human being who is a God kind of friend. This God kind of friend loves you and is there for you adhering to you almost like glue! They are there! But it is a RECIPROCAL friendship. You give and they give. You are both there for one another building up, listening and encouraging one another. This GOD Kind of Friend, is really in EXISTENCE for you. 

So... that is my rendition of this Proverbs 18:24 friend. Our Proverbs 31 role model also fits the bill in this area. She reaches out with her filled hands to you as a friend. Her filled hands, encompassing whatever it is you need. Maybe it is just someone to listen. Maybe it is a shoulder to cry on. Maybe it is someone to just pass the day with running errands or letting your kids play together. Maybe this friend will fill your need of an encourager in your life, a cheerleader.

Friend, your best friend is out there. Today... maybe sow for her. Sow a seed for your best friend that you may not know yet. Maybe it is the seed of encouragement to someone. Maybe it is a text to a friend letting them know you are praying for them. Maybe it is the seed of an encouraging note to someone or phone call. If you are in need, sow a seed.


Share your thoughts! What does a best friend look like to you?




 *sister = the "AMT version" :)

#164 - Wisdom: A Different Perspective

Buenos dias! :) I hear the birds chirping and love it! My next chore?? To wash down the screened in porch so I can return to my Quiet Time oasis and enjoy the beautiful morning sounds of the outdoors! In the meantime, the pollen filled porch will sit with an empty table... just waiting for me. :) I'm coming! I'm coming soon porch!

Proverbs 7:4 - Say to skillful and godly Wisdom, You are my sister, and regard understanding or insight as your intimate friend--

Honestly... I have never thought of Wisdom as "my sister", nor understanding as my "intimate friend." But... when you really begin to boil things down, even the idea of it makes it seem very "light-hearted" and "fun!" I grew up with two sisters.... so I can relate but even if it were a guy reading this verse... it is very applicable to them too. I have a brother as well. When I think of my brother talking to me, I would anticipate he talks to me differently than he would a guy friend. He has the ability to be open, transparent, and know that whatever he says I'm going to listen with an open ear. To talk to someone as a sister, to me brings with it the idea that you are able to go to that person, talk, not be worried or concerned about what they think because regardless of your words or feelings, at the end of the day, they are going to still love you.

A sister. I think of how different my sisters are, and how different of a relationship we have, and even growing up how different it always was. But both, equally as valuable in different ways. The one, we could go out for a run, bend over, let our arms hang and just act goofy! Sometimes just to pass time, we would just act like complete dorks! We'd laugh, have fun and the time would pass, the run would soon be over. We would sit out at the gazebo by my parents pool reading our Bibles, digging in, allowing the Word to change us. One moment we could be laughing, the next moment serious.

So here... even Wisdom could be like that to me?

Wisdom, you are my funny sister. The one I can laugh with and be silly with. Wisdom, you are my serious sister, someone I can search out the Word with, someone I can dig into the Word...someone who I can change with. 

My other sister? We were both cheerleaders. We had a different kind of relationship, closer in age... but we could just lay up and talk through the night. During those times, I wasn't walking with the Lord... so who knows what we talked about... but the door was always open. We could just hang out, do nothing or do something. The intimacy of our friendship was great and still is. Someone who will support, love and encourage. We spent many weekends skiing together, being "cool", finding the hot guys on the slopes. Memories! So.... a friend... someone that I can have fun with!

So Wisdom you also could be to me:

Wisdom, you are an ear to listen. You are also someone I can have fun with. I can enjoy life with. Wisdom you are an intimate ear, you love me for who I am, you accept me where I am. You are always there for me. 

I think of "intimate friends" as it talks about in the latter part of Proverbs 7:4. Regarding understanding and insight as an intimate friend. Do you have that ONE friend, or that ONE person.... they seem like they could be a sister because you are so in tune with each other. It's like you are just kindred friends! You were meant to be together, you were meant to be friends. THAT FRIEND, that is how we are suppose to treat understanding and insight. Seeking it out, pouring into each other. Allowing insight and understanding to pour into you, your Spirit, like you would your best friend.

The Key? The key is TIME. Wisdom, like a sister, is ALWAYS there for us. READY for us to "pick up the phone", "grab coffee with".... Wisdom is READY to stay up late with us and reveal answers to our questions. Understanding & insight, like an intimate friend, they are equally ready.... to look us directly in our eyes and really listen to what we are saying. And WE need to also, be ready to be quiet and LISTEN to our intimate friend. There is no shortness of REVELATIONS. The only shortness is our ability to TAKE THE TIME to receive them. Revelations are in abundance.... WISDOM, INSIGHT & UNDERSTANDING are waiting to reveal these secrets to us.

Take the time today.... maybe it's just to sit in a chair, just you. Quiet. Lean back, and just say, "Wisdom, I call you my sister. Let's talk! I'll even just listen and let you talk! What do you think??"

It puts a different perspective on entering into a time to seek out Wisdom when you know you can go into it as you would with a sister. You can seek understanding going into it like you would an intimate friend. It makes it not awkward, not weird, no pressure, no uneasiness. You wouldn't be nervous having coffee with your sister or friend, Wisdom, the Holy Spirit is the same. You can enter into that time and realize your best friend is always right there with you, waiting.

#90 - Some Truths Can Go Unsaid.

Good morning. It's raining here in Columbia. I'm still enjoying the morning though. Sometimes rain is nice. Out on my porch, it's rather comfortable. As I've been writing my book, it brings me to such different places.... the journey of going back in time and reliving some of the events. It is definitely not always fun. The heaviness of my heart this morning was then confirmed by the scriptures I read today. It's amazing how God does it. The importance of guarding our mouth, guarding our words.... that is what we are going to visit today. 

Proverbs 25:26 - Like a muddied fountain and a polluted spring is a righteous man who yields, falls down, and compromises his integrity before the wicked.

Psalm 25:7 - Remember not the sins (the lapses and frailties) of my youth or my transgressions; according to Your mercy and steadfast love remember me, for Your goodness' sake, O Lord. 

Psalm 55:14 - We had sweet fellowship together and used to walk to the house of God in company. 

Proverbs 31:26 - She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness [giving counsel and instruction].

Well, it is a definite "Praise the Lord" that HE forgets our sin. The moment we ask for forgiveness, our sin is washed away. Like we've talked about lately, as far as the east is from the west, our sin is forgotten. What a wonderful thing! Though that is great, in regards to our words, when sin is accompanied with our words, things we have said, to some, those words may never be forgotten. 

I'll take you back to early on in mine and Tyler's marriage. We were young, obviously still growing in our walk with the Lord, as we still are, and just excited about life. Living life to the fullest. Accomplishing goals. Accomplishing dreams. Chasing God's calling on our life. (Still things we do today!) But, in all that, the key is, we were "raw". We were un-finished, definitely un-polished, and at times our zealousness maybe came off the wrong way to people. 

My best friend while I was in college still lived back home. I was most definitely focused on specific things Tyler and I were pursuing. We had some specific goals, with a time-line and we were very focused. It had been close to two years that I had lived in the south. Living several hundred miles away from someone, being newly married and someone taking the #1 'earthly' spot in my life, and in a focused pursuit of some goals left my friend feeling very unimportant. As I have thought back on the season in my life when we were best friends, it truly was sweet fellowship. We would spend hours talking about the Lord, so green, just so excited to seek Him out and learn about Him. We would read our Bibles together, I'd go visit her and we'd stay up late into the night talking about God and the hopeful plans for our life. Most of our late night talks did revolve around the "boys" in our lives. For me, it was Tyler. I couldn't get my mind off him. I just knew that one day God would reveal to him that he was going to marry me. 


We did have a sweet friendship. But until one day, she confronted my "lack of putting enough effort" into our friendship. It seemed this was a constant guilt trip I had been feeling whenever we talked. I felt frustrated and I felt smothered. Things had definitely changed. In my "raw" way, I finally told her the things I was pursuing with Tyler, my marriage and our goals in our marriage were more important. Yikes. Our conversation quickly ended. I felt horrible, but what I said was true. I maybe didn't have the people skills to do it more tactfully, but what was done was done. 


And that was the end of that. Our friendship never recovered. She was hurt. I was hurt. What I said and the way I said it definitely did not reflect the "law of kindness" like the Proverbs 31 woman. They were things that were true, they were my feelings, but they were not said in kindness. My invitation to be a bridesmaid in her upcoming wedding had soon been recanted, and our friendship left a dark pit in my heart. 


Sure... God forgave me. Many times over through the years that I talked to God about it. Asked for forgiveness, and even asked for my friends forgiveness, but what was done could not be undone. Forgiven, yes. Forgotten, no. 


Will anything ever come of the friendship I once shared? I'm not sure. She was a very dear friend during a very pivotal time in my life. A time when I needed a Christian friend, she was there. Sure, I felt a bit smothered at times.... but she was a great friend. 


I've learned from it. I'd like to say I'm more polished now, more studied in the Word, less raw. I know now, if we ask God's direction, seek His face, He always has an answer. Like the Proverbs 31 woman, it is an answer wrapped in kindness. And.... I have definitely learned that some truths can go unsaid.


Guard your tongue today. God will forget, but sometimes people have a hard time forgetting. If in doubt, don't say it, just be quiet. Some truths can go unsaid.