Repenting for Not Loving.

1 Corinthians 13:1-3,11 - Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

Wow! Let's just say it was a morning for a good spiritual spanking. Have you ever gotten one of those? What conviction I received as I read this morning, all started from a book I'm finishing up. The topic of the section I was reading was "love."

The author gave the analogy of dirty pipe. In one side of the pipe, an ABUNDANCE of water was gushing in. On the other side of the pipe, only a small trickle of dirty water was coming out. The water gushing in represented the glory of the Lord. The pipe, represented "our" spirit. The trickle of water coming out of the pipe represented the presence of the Lord after going through us. The Glory of the Lord in its fullness, came out of the pipe in such minimal proportions, that it would create a dirty, yucky pond at best. Why? Because of all the dirt in the pipe. All of the sin, unforgiveness, lack of love that was in the found in "our spirits." What this was doing? It was LIMITING the Blessing of the Lord to show up in our lives, in any and all areas. 

I hesitantly allowed myself to begin to reflect. Were there any people that I held unforgiveness or bitterness towards? I allowed my mind to run through possibilities. What about love? Was there anyone who I had not shown love to? I immediately had a few people come to mind. They were people that I chose not to associate with. Why? Because they were completely different than me. Different political view, different spiritual view, different personality, different everything! Ok.... I'm airing my dirty laundry here, so put down your stones for a minute. So here this person is, I have had the opportunity to show love to, and I have not. Not even once. Instead, I put on judgmental glasses, in my heart felt more disgust towards them than anything. It makes me sad to just say that "out loud." All because they are different than me? And, of all people, the Lord reminded me as I received my spiritual spanking, 

"Amy, as it stands, _______________, is currently on the path to hell. So is her husband and children, unless people step in with love. Amy, you did nothing but in your heart condemn her because she is not like you, because her beliefs are different. Amy, I desire you to see people with MY eyes, through eyes of love. Judgement is not for you to do. One day, based upon people's decision, judgement will come, and if you have LOVED them, hopefully they will be judged as righteous, and enter into the Kingdom of heaven."

My lack of love, was not getting this person anywhere closer to coming into a saving relationship with Jesus Christ. After receiving what I needed to receive, other than being thankful that I listened, I immediately had to repent. What a skewed focus I have had on people, all because of differences. My love or lack of love, may be the ONLY thing some people see that may ever draw them to the saving grace of Jesus Christ. If I look through the eyes of love, I would see people who need Jesus. Not only them, but THEIR CHILDREN!

I am repenting for NOT LOVING. It should be my UTMOST desire to show and share the love of Jesus, because the lives of FAMILIES depend on it. I think of 3 year olds and 2 year olds, newborn babies. Based upon how their parents believe is going to be how these kids are raised for the next 18 years. If the parents KNOW Jesus, the kids will grow up in a Christ-Centered home. If the parents DO NOT KNOW Jesus, these kids will grow up in a World-Centered home vs Christ-Centered home.

I need to show love.

Lord, forgive me! Forgive me for not loving! Forgive me for being judgmental. Lord, forgive me for being selfish! I will do my best to show love from now on. Lord please quicken inside me if I revert back. Please remind me, when I'm around those who are different than I am, remind me to show love. Remind me to be attentive. Allow me to hear your Voice in how to minister to them. Whether it just be listening to them, asking them questions about their life, offering to help them in some way. Lord help me to love. Help me to show Your Love to people who desperately need it. Help me to love people the way YOU want them to be loved!! Lord please CHANGE ME!!! Change ME, so that I can encompass love, so that I can show love. Please help me not to get caught up with acting like those I am around. I don't desire to be like others, Lord I desire to be like You!!! Father thank you that according to 1 John 1:9, you forgive me! Thank you for forgiving me! It is my desire to do better! It is my desire to show love! I love you Father! I praise you! And THANK YOU for loving me! Thank you for correcting me! Thank you for steering me back on course. I love you!

#228 - Freedom of Choice

Proverbs 1:23-33 - ²³If you will turn (repent) and give heed to my reproof, behold, I [Wisdom] will pour out my spirit upon you, I will make my words known to you.
    ²⁴Because I have called and you have refused [to answer], have stretched out my hand and no man has heeded it,
    ²⁵And you treated as nothing all my counsel and would accept none of my reproof,
    ²⁶I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when the thing comes that shall cause you terror and panic--
    ²⁷When your panic comes as a storm and desolation and your calamity comes on as a whirlwind, when distress and anguish come upon you.
    ²⁸Then will they call upon me [Wisdom] but I will not answer; they will seek me early and diligently but they will not find me.
    ²⁹Because they hated knowledge and did not choose the reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord,
    ³⁰Would accept none of my counsel, and despised all my reproof,
    ³¹Therefore shall they eat of the fruit of their own way and be satiated with their own devices.
    ³²For the backsliding of the simple shall slay them, and the careless ease of [self-confident] fools shall destroy them.
    ³³But whoso hearkens to me [Wisdom] shall dwell securely and in confident trust and shall be quiet, without fear or dread of evil. 

Proverbs 31:26a -  She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom...

Recently, Tyler said something to me that was really profound, it helped me. He said, "God will respect anyone's right of freedom of choice." Everyone has complete freedom of choice! For the sinner or Non-Believer, God will completely protect their right to go to hell. He does not force ANYONE to choose Him. He is a Gentleman and allows each person to make their own decision whether to follow Him or not. He does the same for the Christian. He allows each Christian the CHOICE to follow and be obedient to Him. Equally, He allows them the choice to choose wrong if they want. If they want to choose to go "their way," He will allow them that choice. Again, He is a Gentleman and does not have ANY forced followers. Every person who follows Jesus, follows by their own free will. 

I typically don't include such a large section of scripture, but this morning I just couldn't decide what to leave out, so I included Proverbs 1:23-33. I study out of a Zondervan Parallel Bible which includes the King James Version in one column and the Amplified Bible in the other column. I really like it. This morning, as we were introduced to Proverbs chapter 1, I read some of the notes at the bottom of my Bible. It made a great recommendation in saying this, "Wisdom here is personified. Read 'Wisdom of God' instead of 'Wisdom' and see the wonderful power of this book." That has been helpful to me as I have read Proverbs 1. 

It has been helpful to realize that we can not change people, we can only be obedient to the leading of God's Voice & direction. In interacting with Christians and Non-Christians, He may lead us to share the Gospel with them. He may lead us to just listen. He may lead us to live by example. Ultimately though, however God may lead us in each situation, the person we are interacting with has choices to make on their own. They have the freedom to allow the Bible to be their guide, and be obedient to the Bible. OR, they have the free will to choose their feelings & "their" wants over what the Word says. Proverbs 1:23-33, to me, is a bit scary when read from the eyes of the person who chooses to go "THEIR WAY." I want to do what I want. I want to go MY way. I want to do it MY way! I don't care what the RIGHT thing to do is, I want to do it MY way. I don't feel like doing it the way the Bible says.  

All I have to say is, YIKES! That is a scary place to be for that person. As believers, we have the responsibility to be obedient to what God tells us to do. If it's directing a friend, we need to be obedient in directing them. But.... ultimately they have Freedom of Choice. 

Don't forget the power of prayer. Prayer changes things. When someone we love chooses to go "their way," remember that the power of prayer can always help them to soften to the leading of the Holy Spirit. That their "Freedom of Choice" would change to be a choice that would please our Heavenly Father. 

Is their someone you need to pray for today? Is their someone you need to talk to today? 

#81 - What Sin?

Good morning! Well... I thought I'd share a couple pictures of "THE BOY" in case we aren't pals on Facebook! This was the other night at dinner!! WHOA! I know! IT WAS ALL DAD!!!! I just am not a fan of the gross mess, but dad said, "Let him be! Let him do it! He can feed himself." AHHHH! So, reluctantly I held in my urge to help. I warned Tyler up front that if Tyler Jr was going to feed himself that I was not going to do the "clean-up" OR "bath time!" Sianara! No way Jose! So, Tyler Sr agreed and here is the fruit of that decision! One word: MESS!!!

For real, this is the happiest baby!! He is such a joy and blessing!
He will be a great big brother when that time comes! 

This shows a little bit of his personality! Tyler Jr is SOOO funny!
We just laugh all the time at our house!

OK... well, we have MyGym today, so let's get rolling! I'm still getting used to "remembering" that whole "MyGym" thing! You'd think it would be well implanted in my mind! Anyone that sees me Tuesday nights, feel free to REMIND ME about it!!! HA! :) 

Check the reading schedule for what we read today. And let's do this! It's some GOOD STUFF today!! I'm excited to see how the Holy Spirit brings it all together. I was just jammin out while I read! I was saying, "WOW! For real! This is all so good!!" Isn't it fun when you are in the Word and you have times like that?! When you are just like, "FOR REAL GOD!??!! This is some good stuff!" It's like, "Duh. Of course it is!" lol! Ok... I'm going to quit humoring myself and get started! Oh... one more thing.... a "PS" if you will.... a shout out to Danielle H! She is the one who said, "Amy, I like it when you put pictures up." So, the pictures are for you Danielle! :) Have a great day at work! hehe!

Psalm 6:6 - I am weary with my groaning; all night I soak my pillow with tears, I drench my couch with my weeping. 

Psalms 36:1-2 - TRANSGRESSION [like an oracle] speaks to the wicked deep in his heart. There is no fear or dread of God before his eyes. For he flatters and deceives himself in his own eyes that his iniquity will not be found out and be hated.  

Psalm 66:18 - If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me.  

Psalms 66:9-10, 12b - Who put and kept us among the living, and has not allowed our feet to slip. For You, O God, have proved us; You have tried us as silver is tried, refined, and purified.... we went through fire and through water, BUT You brought us out into a broad, moist place [to abundance and refreshment and the open air]. 

Psalm 66:16, 96:3 - Come and hear, all you who reverently and worshipfully fear God, and I will declare what He has done for me! Declare His glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the peoples.

Psalm 126:5 - They who sow in tears shall reap in joy and singing. 

OK... WOW! This is some good stuff! Brace yourself! A quick synopsis before we start. SIN. VICTORY. ACTION. Hopefully you are reading a "color-coated" computer or SmartPhone. So we are visiting SIN, then the experience of VICTORY, and then the ACTION we are called to take here. This is good stuff. 


Psalm 6... as I read the amplified and I read that David here was weeping in his PILLOW, a soft spot touched me. Weeping in his PILLOW?! I mean... for real?! If you think about someone weeping in a pillow, who comes to mind? A big military leader? A king? Yah, I didn't think so! That didn't come to my mind either. What came to my mind was a young girl, crying over a boyfriend, or some gossip going around at school. I didn't picture this "Man after God's Own Heart", not just crying, but WEEPING into a pillow. Weeping. Remorse. Guilt. Sorrow. 


Psalm 36 carries us into our sometimes naivety in the area of sin. Our naivety when we think that our sin will not be found out! It says that this person who is holding in this sin deceives himself. To think our SIN won't be found out? To be pious enough to think that we can RUN from our sin? That we can hide? Where can we go to hide? When I think about hiding, I think about running down to the playground down the road from where we live. To hide there. Or... like a child, to hide under my covers. To do what I have often done, and pulled the covers up over my head and just stay in bed. I will hide in my sleep. If I sleep, I can hide. My sin won't be found out. But the reality of it all is, we can continue to run or we can continue to try to hide, but in God's omnipotence, he knows all along where we are. As we run, it is as if he watches his favorite child running away. He sees the back of us as we are running down the sidewalk. Our Father, stands back at our house, His face just longing for us to come back. His face, filled with sorrow, hurt and pain. He understands the guilt we are feeling, our hurt. And His greatest desire as we come running back repenting and asking for forgiveness is to tell us, "My child, what sin? My child, I love you. What sin? Your sin is as far as the east is from the west. All I see is my child, white as snow. Unblemished. Darling, what sin?"


When we hold that sin in, the longer we keep it close to our hearts, the colder we become. The more callous our heart becomes, our spirit, our outlook on life. We begin to build sin upon sin. Lie upon lie. We continue to just cover up our sin. And until we come to repentance, the Lord will not hear our cries. 


God wants us to know the outcome. "Child! Please just come to Me! My Child, come! Come! Draw near to Me! In this place, with Me is abundance Child. In this place is wholeness. In this place you don't have to run. In this place you are safe. In this place (your name), I have EVERY good gift for you! Everything that you have been praying for, it is here. Everything you have been longing for, it is here. The secret desires that you have just kept in your head, Darling, even those are here. I have those! Don't run. It just takes you humbling yourself, laying it down. Don't keep carrying that sin. Don't keep carrying that care. Lay it down here. Lay it down at my feet. Lay it down at the alter. My Child, my desire is for you to have abundance. I want to bless you. If your heart is cold and turned from me, I can't hear you. Through the tears you have cried, joy and singing will come. Morning will come. Draw near to Me."


What sin? What sin? When we humble ourself before our Almighty Father, shame, guilt, sorrow, torment..... when we take that step, often such a hard step, to repent his comment to us is, "What Sin?" As far as the east is from the west, when we repent, He has already forgotten it. Praise the Lord. We no longer have to carry around the shame or the guilt. The actions, the things that we have done that we feel shame about, dirty, disappointed, those things are literally cast into a SEA of FORGETFULNESS! They are GONE! So lay down your burdens once and for all. Lay down the sins that have been so easily entangling you. Lay them down at the feet of Jesus so they can be forgotten and you can walk into a world of freedom and abundance. Declare HIS faithfulness! Declare what He has done for you! Declare His freedom!


You can be forgiven. Nothing is to bad. And your Father will literally forgive and forget! His desire is to say, "Child, What sin?" 

#61 - Forgotten

Good morning! Can you share with me the excitement, the satisfaction, the pride you can have when you know you are obedient to the Lord? When you have done something that HE has instructed you to do. You have not procrastinated, you may not have gotten it down quite perfect yet, but you have completed the assignment. What a good feeling. What a good feeling to be obedient knowing that because of obedience and diligence, great rewards are on the horizon. Praise the Lord! :) Well.... let's get started.


Reading Schedule: Proverbs 31:10-31, Proverbs 2, Psalms 2, 32, 62, 92, 122

Proverbs 2:16b-17 - ...to deliver you from the alien woman...Who forsakes the husband and guide of her youth and forgets the covenant of her God. 

Psalms 32:3-5 - When I kept silence [before I confessed], my bones wasted away through my groaning all the day long. For day and night Your hand [of displeasure] was heavy upon me...I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I did not hide. I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord [continually unfolding the past till all is told]--then You [instantly] forgave me the guilt and iniquity of my sin...

Psalms 92:13-15 - Planted in the house of the Lord, they shall flourish in the courts of our God. [Growing in grace] they shall still bring forth fruit in old age; they shall be full of sap [of spiritual vitality]... They are living memorials...  

Proverbs 31:11 - The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil. 

Wow! What fullness in the very words. What fullness in the Words we can read. It's almost as the verses above tell a story. A story of a woman who had forgotten... a woman who once knew God, who once had a relationship with Him, but allowed it to slip away. Forgot. Faded. Imagine if that same woman would have continued on.... confessing all her sins to the Lord, acknowledging it all, just spilling everything to the Lord.... all the while, He already knew all of her sins. Unfolding the past till all is told. What beauty in the very transparency of it all. The sweetness of release takes place, guilt is lifted. Guilt is taken away, and newness of life occurs. A new lease on life begins. 


If the alien woman would have continued.... continued on further in her walk with the Lord until she was living a life that was flourishing. Firmly planted in her relationship with God. Firmly planted in her devotion to a living Savior! What beauty! Continually growing in grace, greeting old age in fullness, in SPIRITUAL VITALITY! The words alone express victory. Express one who has lived a life full of victory and still charging forward with fervor. Spiritual Vitality. Living in old age, lasting, pursuing life to the fullest. A victory of being known as a living memorial! A living memorial! Typically a memorial is a tribute to someone who has done something great, but who has passed away. Imagine this alien woman, changing her course and direction, to get into her older years and be recognized by people around as a living memorial! She is CONTINUING to do great things! She has made her name great. She has served with greatness. She has pursued with passion. She has followed her one true love, her Lord and Savior, Jesus. And what is a result of it all? How does it affect her marriage? It affects her marriage in such a great way. It affects her marriage in total belief, respect and reliance from her husband. He does not rely on her in a weak sense... in a sense that he has given over leadership to her, he has not. He is 100% man. He is 100% leader of their marriage. But, he has allowed himself to be vulnerable to believing in her. Her roots are so firmly planted in the Lord, that he can trust her. He does not have to second guess her decisions. He does not have to have a hint of doubt when she does something. From the very CORE of his being, he knows that what she does, she has reason. What she does, there is purpose. What she does, even if it may seem questionable at the way it is approached, he knows in the depths of him that she most definitely has been led by the Holy Spirit, and the fullness of her actions will unfold to show the greatness of God's plan. He trusts her. 


He trusts her fully.


If only. If only the alien woman would have chose to change her course. She could have experienced this all. She could have experienced a life more fulfilling than the danger or risque life she was living. Lurking on corners. Never being fully loved by a man. Never experiencing the fullness of friends or fulfillment towards a worthy cause. If only she would have not forgotten the God of her youth. 


Today... where are you in the story? 

• Are you at the cross roads? Are you there at the point where you need to choose.... choose a life living for the world or a life living for your God?
• Are you at the place of repentance? Are you full of guilt and shame? Does it feel like it is hurting your heart, like it just wants to break from your chest? Are you at a place where you just need to spill all.... run to the Savior you know is there. Run to the Friend that you know will be there in Jesus? Are you in that place? Where you need to repent? 
• Maybe you are in the place where victory you are experiencing? You are firmly planted? You are now working towards leaving your lasting mark on this world. Leaving a mark that will carry on for generations. Maybe you are working on being that living memorial? 
• Or maybe you are there, desiring to be the spouse you know you need to be. Desiring to have such complete trust and unity with your spouse. Desiring to change the dirty. Desiring to change the hesitancy in his thoughts about your actions.... not knowing if your next actions will be for yourself or what you both know God would want. Maybe you are at the place where, like the Proverbs 31 woman, her husband trusts her completely. Has NO lack of honest gain. Has full confidence, respect and trust in her. Maybe YOU are working to grow in this area. This area where your husband does not doubt you or question you, but fully trusts all your actions. 

Wherever you are today... pray. Take the next step. Choose God. Repent. Ask for forgiveness. Continue aggressively to make a difference. Or begin to BE the trustworthy person. Begin the pursuit to be a trusted wife & living memorial, to leave a lasting impact on this world.

Today.... ask yourself.... where am I in this story? Where am I? What do I need to do next. 

Do not be the forgotten. Do not forget the God of your youth. Do not pursue life forgetting the most important Guide. Leader. Director of life. It would most certainly be a life of unfulfillment and loss to live having forgotten.

__________________________________________

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Thanks so much! I am equally blessed to hear what the Lord says each day. I love to hear His Voice and follow His direction. There is no better thing in life to know when you are hearing your Creator, and being obedient to His Voice. 


Thanks again for reading. I am blessed to have you as a brother or sister in Christ. Until we meet....

                            Xoxo, 

                                      Amy J.

Follow me on Twitter: @amyjmccart